One year ago yesterday I made the decision to pack up what I could and move from OH back to my hometown in FL. My life as I had know had fallen apart. Living with my mom let alone moving back to my home state was not something I had ever considered once I left over ten years before. But I found myself packing up the life I had built and getting on a plane with my two year old daughter to take time to regroup. One year later I find myself better than where I started when I first came home.
Living With Mom Is Not Shameful
I recently read, “Unlearning the Shame of Living with My Parents As an Adult” and recognized what Samantha Paige Rosen was sharing as very similar to my thoughts when moving home. It was hard to unlearn the belief that to return to my mother’s home was shameful. I pride myself in independence. I know today that I have nothing to be ashamed of.
Letting others help has been hard but impactful
I have asked for and received more help in the last year than I ever have in a long time. I don’t like asking for help. Having others help me often made me uncomfortable. I would constantly make up excuses to why I shouldn’t receive or ask for help. I’d tell myself I’m an adult, I should be able to take care of it, people are going to think less of me, etc. Pride has played a huge factor in my hesitation to ask for or receive help. However I have learned receiving help has provided me so much growth, rest, and stability.
Seeing my daughter thrive has been worth the move
My daughter has always been the driving factor in my reason for moving. I wanted to give her a better home than the one she was in. I wanted her to be surrounded by family who would be actively invested in her life. The child I brought from OH is a completely different child than the one that is currently living in FL. Seeing her loved daily not just by me but by her grandma, aunts, uncles, great-grandpa, great-aunts, and great-uncles brings happy tears to my eyes.
Living with my mom has made me a better person and mother
This year has not been all roses and daises. There have been times where living with my mom has been challenging. Nonetheless, just like my daughter, who I was a year ago is not who I am now. I am better mentally, emotionally, financially, physically, and spiritually. I have let go of a lot of negativity and embraced more positivity. There is now so much more understanding and respect for who my mom is. My motherhood journey has benefitted from this time. My daughter has a better and more balanced mother.
I look forward to more life lessons along the way.